Tension...

There seems to be something in our human nature that pushes us to stay out of situations, conversations, beliefs, and relationships that put us in an environment of tension.

We always want things to be black and white. One side or the other. We want things to be spelled out for us, written in stone so that we can always look back on things and let them tell us who we are.

Why? I think the obvious answer is that we want to be comfortable. When things are black and white we can stop thinking about them and struggling with them. We can sit in our chair drinking coffee and reading the paper knowing that nothing is going to rock our world becuase we have already figured it all out. We neatly package every situation, conversation, set of beliefs, and relationship and then stamp a label on the top that either says black or white, good or bad.

Where does that leave us...?

Comfortable but not learning. Safe but not imagining. And in most cases if we are honest, bored.

But we still continue to do this day in and day out. Never letting new ideas infultrate us and have a chance to influence us, not to mention, God forbid, they change us.

Why?

Because living in the middle, in the grey, in the tension, is uncomfortable. We never feel like we can put our foot down on something. There never seems to be level ground below our ideas and beliefs when you are in the tension.

I have been learning more and more everyday I am on this journey that though living in the tension of life is uncomfortable, it holds the essence of what it means to live, learn, and imagine.

Take a rubberband for instance( I hope this isnt to cheesy). When a rubberband is not being used it is basically worthless. A rubberband sitting on a table can be used for nothing. But when we stretch the rubberband, when we apply tension, we can use the rubber band for numerous useful and helpful things. But, we have to also realize that if we stretch a rubberband to far, we apply to much tension, it will snap and again be useless.

It is only when the rubberband is in the middle of the tension, not stretched to far but stretched enough to apply pressure, that it can actually be useful and do what it was made to do.

I believe that when we allow ourselves to live without tension we are just like an unstretched rubberband on a table. We are not being used for what we were made to do. We are not allowing ourselves to think the way we were made to, to be creative, frustrated, loving, irritated, amazed...I could go on forever.

I know for myself that my most amazing and creative ideas, work, and thoughts are concieved in times when I experience great tension in my life and in my heart. When I am being stretched, twisted, and confronted with the things around me. There are the few, but inspirational, times in my life when instead of running to my coffee and newpaper, I let the tension become a part of me and let it change me and influence me.

I hope and pray that as friends and family we encourage each other to step outside of comfort and black and white and step into the tensions of life, allowing it to influence us and change us. Allowing us to become more understanding and passionate, more kindhearted and humble.